Can You Have a Relationship in New York City Without Dating


This spring I met somebody…somebody special.  But we’re both New Yorkers and these days you have to work almost 24/7 to keep a job and keep your head above water.  We like each other a lot but there’s been almost no time to do things like, well, date.  So what has resulted is a developing relationship on an emotional level without the nuts and bolts of dating.  How’s that?  Well she’s a bartender at a craft beer bar and I’m the craft beer buyer for a fancy grocery store and a veteran NYC barfly.  In other words we have lots to talk about when we’re not just dreamily gazing into each other’s eyes.  In addition, I cook for her since she’s a foodie and rarely gets to eat home cooked meals.  It was a way of proving that I was more than just a regular customer.  I started writing about it a few weeks ago, and here are the installments so far.

It begins with chili

It continues with craft beer

Then we muse about the new middle age

Then I question my manhood relative to her potential expectations

Episode 5 is all about cooking

Episode 6 is about an unlikely source of wisdom in this adventure, finance bros

In Episode 7 we finally plan our first date.

In Episode 8, I weather the Aftermath.

In Episode 9, We deal with the Aftermath.

Three more episodes are written and this could go 20 or 30.  Ultimately, it’s about food, love, craft beer, NYC 2017 and life these days.



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About jmartin437

I've worked in and around the world of high end cheese for 27 years. I've been everything from a department manager who hired and fired and trained staffs to a weekend warrior who shows up ties on an apron the middle of a rush and talks to customers and cleans up the place. I enjoy it all, and I especially like my current situation conducting informal seminars about cheese at area bars and in class at the 92nd St. Y. The current schedule is always up at In addition I conduct private events that are perfect to lead off birthday parties for foodies and sommeliers and also they make great entertainment for corporate team building events and associates meetings at law firms. In addition, I've been a freelance journalist for 27 years. Currently my profiles of leading musicians and filmmakers appear in the Wall Street Journal and I also wrote about sports for the Root, and for five loooong years, which included the entirety of the Isiah Thomas Knicks era, I wrote about the NBA for the New York Sun. I enjoyed writing about basketball so much that I now do it here at rotations for free.
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